When dreams threaten to come true...

“I love that dirty water…”

My evil boss finally got fired today, but the pressures stepped up as one of my best friends becomes my coworker. I forgot to pass in several assignments, but I actually went to class. I have so much stuff to pay for, and so little money.

Needless to say, despite all the good and bad things going on in my life, despite the mounting anxiety that threatens to topple me, I have a distant light in the future that I’m desperately clinging to. And, unlike so many dreams, this one isn’t slipping through my fingers… yet. It may actually just come true. There are certainly obstacles, but I refuse to give up. I need to embark upon my own adventure, or I may just be buried alive.

I’m going to France

I’m actually moving to Cap Camarat, Ramatuelle. It’s been my childhood dream to live outside of St.Tropez and compose great novels, and now it’s actually happening. I may not write (although I may!), but I will learn French and I will get a damn good tan. And I’ll have a frickin blast.

But what – if anything – must I give up? Like I’ve said before, how do you drop everything in persuit of a dream? I will give up my wild freedom of working (and boozing) hard with good, fun people. I will give up a summer in the city I love. I will give up the comforts and securities of my family and friends. I’ll give up the familiarities of home.

But I will gain the freedom to follow my heart and wander to any part of the beautiful landscape of Europe. I will meet new, exciting, and fun – albeit probably slightly skeezier than my current crew – people. I will experience summer in a magical place that thrives with the “who’s who” of the entire world for the several months I’ll be living there. And I’ll find my own niche, my own friends, in a strange, new place.

I stare this amazing opportunity in the eye, yet hesitate. Granted, there are a lot of significant challenges I must first overcome, but I also worry about home. I fear more than anything that I'll miss too much. I’ll miss amazing times. I’ll be forgotten.

But the trust is: when you go away, nothing really changes at home. Despite the seemingly-world-ending-dramas, despite the fun weekends and new memories, despite our constantly changing lives, nothing REALLY changes. When I come home in the fall, Boston will still be here. My friends will still be here. And they will still love to dress up, go out, and party hard. All that will change is my perspective, my life experience. I will simply have added some new memories.

I can’t wait to go. I can’t wait to run off on my own adventure.

And I can’t wait to come home, either.
I love my friends. I’ll miss my family. Oh, Boston you’re my home…